It’s been a busy week for Rep. Tom Tancredo.
Perhaps because of ongoing criticism about his one-trick-burro status on the presidential campaign trail, Tancredo this week decided to branch out by taking desultory potshots at gay rights and abortion. But his teensy-tiny heart just didn’t seem to be in it.
On Oct. 1, Tancredo spoke to New Hampshire Right to Life members about his decades-long opposition to abortion. He pontificated upon his morally stainless record of defending the unborn since he was elected to the Colorado legislature in’76, on and on, blah, blah…
And then, he just couldn’t resist.
From the New Hampshire Union Leader:
“Last night, [Tancredo] linked the pro-life cause to illegal immigration, which he said is driven, in part, by the need for more workers. The decline of American workers, he said, is related to the approximately 50 million abortions performed since the Supreme Court’s Roe v. Wade decision in 1973.”
To Tancredo, every fetal tadpole ostensibly represents an eventual employee who will stave off an undocumented Latino from stealing a coveted meatpacking plant job. If only more knocked-up teenagers considered this flawless logic when they were weighing their parental options, the world would no doubt be a better place: one filled with millions more unwanted white kids stuck in the unwanted jobs they refuse to perform even today.
A few days later, the Tancrazy Train pulled back into Iowa. On Oct. 5, he stationed himself on the steps of the Iowa Capitol, surrounded by a crowd of what the Des Moines Register estimated to be roughly 12 supporters. Before he was interrupted by a protester, Tancredo began preaching about the so-called sanctity of marriage to his gathered dozen. (Last month, an Iowa judge ruled that the state’s ban on gay marriage was unconstitutional, prompting a firestorm of debate here.)
As much as he would have liked to, Tancredo couldn’t seem to find a way to insert immigration into this debate. However, he did share another characteristically enlightening view: that allowing two people of the same sex to get married would no doubt fling wide the door to bigamy, polygamy and incest.
“It could happen,” he was quoted as saying.
In other news, Tancredo recently shifted his Iowa campaign headquarters from the college town of Ames to Clive, an affluent, white suburb of Des Moines. He’d been renting retail space along the main drag in Iowa State University’s Campustown, likely for its proximity to the overrated Republican Straw Poll.
This week, a visit to the former HQ confirmed the space is officially for rent; the only indicators that Tancredo had been there were a forlorn bumper sticker and the detritus of some sort of food product that had apparently been lobbed at the front window.
The origin and content of said food product was not immediately identifiable, so I snapped some photos and sought the expert advice of friends and other qualified professionals with liberal arts degrees. Their opinions are inconclusive:
“Yikes, that’s disgusting. I’m gonna have to go with tuna salad sandwich dipped in milk.”
“The last bite of a gyro?” (A sensible speculation, given the proximity of a popular late-night street-meat stand one block away.)
“It looks like an ice cream burrito. I think I see an onion and red and green peppers. Maybe the rest is sour cream? It has to be something Mexican, or it wouldn’t be as insulting.”
Thoughts? What are those chunks sticking to Tancredo’s window?