There are lessons for Northern Coloradans to learn from Metallica's James Hetfield's recent detention at London's Luton Airport for having a "Taliban-like" beard. Lessons we can learn the easy way (by following the advice of this blog) or the hard way (by allowing the terrorists to hide amongst us, thereby contributing to the downfall of Western Civilization).
Here's the deal: We are certainly not the only ones to notice the high concentration of relatively harmless hippies amongst us. The terrorists have likely noticed as well. Considering hippie and terrorist grooming habits tend to be similar, Northern Coloradans should be on the look out for evildoers blending with jam noodlers. This goes for you, too, hippies: Beware of bearded buddies who won't pass the dutchie.
Luckily, we have Jam Band Fan or Taliban to help.
If you get confused, listen to the music play.