Friday, May 9

"Do not try shrink me, gypsy"

With the onset of summer, we must stay vigilant -- of wildfires, West Nile virus and, of course, gypsies. According to the Larimer County Sheriff's Office, the season is ripe for gypsies to overtake and deceive us (and perhaps even shrink us down):
The Larimer County Sheriff’s Office would like to caution residents against door-to-door con artists. These itinerant criminals known as “Travelers” and “Gypsies,” generally appear in the summertime and are often members of one family. Annually these professionals collectively make millions of dollars off the vulnerability of older Coloradoans. ...

A FRAUD ALERT! supplied by the State of Colorado Office of the District Attorney offers these observations on recognizing “Travelers”:

Recognizing “Gypsies”:
They impersonate water department, Public Service Company or city workers. They may even wear a uniform and flash a badge.
They say they need to inspect pipes or the furnace, or weeds next to the homeowner’s property.
They will require the homeowner to accompany them to the basement, bathroom or backyard, under the premise of needing assistance.
They may say the homeowner is owed a rebate because utility bills are too high – then watch where the home owner goes to get change for a $50 bill.
While distracting the homeowner, others will ransack bedrooms in search of cash and jewelry.

“Travelers” and “Gypsies” travel extensively and work in well-organized teams. Although they appear friendly and likeable, these itinerant criminals are a ruthless group of thieves, who consider themselves superior to other criminals and citizens. They further believe their elderly victims deserve to be conned. ...

If you suspect Travelers or Gypsies are in your neighborhood, don’t answer your door, never let strangers in your home. And above all, call Larimer County Sheriff’s Office at 970-416-1985 if you live in the county or Fort Collins Police Services 970-221-6540 if you reside in the city limits.
The announcement doesn't mention so, but if gypsies offer services in trade for their tears, always accept the deal; it's good luck. Also, we should be cautious if someone like this guy (see video below) shows up at our front doors, which begs the question: Who will protect the gypsies, wa-wa-woo?


Borat - The Gypsy Yard Sale

1 comment:

Andy said...

Next week: "The Carny Menace: They smell like cabbage!"